Read

Why I'm Okay Being Single on Valentine’s Day

Published:
February 15, 2024
February 5, 2020
Read why this author is totally fine with being single on Valentine's Day.|Read why this author is totally fine with being single on Valentine's Day.|Read why this author is totally fine with being single on Valentine's Day.

I love Valentine’s Day. The hopeless romantic in me loves the idea of a day filled with flowers, a well-planned date night, and plenty of I-love-you’s. Maybe I’ve watched way too many Nicholas Sparks movies, but I can’t deny I’m a sucker for all the romantic gestures of the holiday.

I just have one small problem: I don’t have a man to share the day with this year.

In the past, I might have felt like I was missing out. Maybe I’d plan a Galentine’s Day to fill the void. But this year is different.

I’m okay with being single. My feelings and desires might tell me otherwise, but I know from experience of past relationships that it’s not everything. I don’t need a man to make me happy. Do I want one in my life? Absolutely! But my happiness cannot and should not rest in my relationship status. I refuse to let it.

I refuse to sit here wishing for a boyfriend to make my life better. I’ve made that mistake before. It not only robs my peace and happiness in the present, but also crushes future relationships by the weight of expectation.

Because here’s the thing: Even if I were in a relationship, that guy can never bring me perfect happiness. So it’s unfair to expect them to.

Our society reinforces this idea that “love is all you need,” and that being in a relationship is everything. While this thought is disordered, there is some truth behind it.

Each of us has an innate desire burning in our hearts to be loved. I don’t care who you are or what you do, we all desire to be known, seen, and loved to the core. Our past mistakes, our guard, or just our weaknesses as human beings might cause this desire to be manifested in different ways, but we all want the same thing in the end.

And we are going to satisfy that desire in one way or another.

Some people turn to a romantic relationship, some people turn to addictions and unhealthy habits, some people even turn to work to get the attention and praise of others. But none of these will actually satisfy the deep longing of our hearts to be loved. Sure, your significant other can love you to the best of their ability, but it will never be good enough. We are human and our love is imperfect.

There is only one way to satisfy our deep longing to be loved: accepting the love of a God who loves us infinitely and forever. A God who loves us so much that He came to earth to die for us just so He could have each of us next to Him in heaven one day.

It wasn’t until I let this everlasting love be enough for me that I became content and joyful in my singleness.

Do I still get lonely? All the time. Do I still dream of marrying an awesome guy one day and having children with him? 1,000 percent yes. But I rest in the truth that even if that never happens, even if I never find the man of my dreams, I am still known and loved by a Man who loves me more than anyone on earth. He pursues my heart daily, so what more can my romantic heart ask for?

And the bonus side of this is if and when I do find a man to marry one day, I will be confident and content in the fact that I am already infinitely known and loved. I won’t need a man’s love and attention to make me happy because I already am! Falling in love will be that much sweeter. We won’t be crushed under the weight of expectation — we will be able to give each other our imperfect love and be content with it because we know it’s not everything. Rather, our everything is waiting for us in heaven. Our love will simply be practice for how we should love our first love: Jesus Christ.

Maybe you accept this truth — maybe you’re trying to be content and happy in your period of singleness, but are struggling. I get it. Sometimes it’s much harder to feel the love of God than a human being right next to you.

But have you given Him time? Have you given Him a chance? He is always waiting for you, ready to tell you how much He loves you. He will say it again and again, however many times you need to hear it. He will say it again: I love you.

God is the biggest romantic of them all. Whether you are single or in a relationship, rest in His embrace this Valentine’s Day.

Read why this author is totally fine with being single on Valentine's Day.

Creators:
Josie Kuhlman
Published:
February 15, 2024
February 5, 2020
On a related note...
5 Hobbies You Can Take on Solo

5 Hobbies You Can Take on Solo

Marye Colleen Larme

Despite My Infertility, I Am Still a Mother

Despite My Infertility, I Am Still a Mother

Stacey Huneck

"Forgotten by February"

"Forgotten by February"

Grace Poppe

How to Be More Productive in the Age of Information Overload

How to Be More Productive in the Age of Information Overload

Josh Flynt

How to Become a More Patient Person

How to Become a More Patient Person

Emily Bouch

How the Gottmans’ Research Saved Our Marriage

How the Gottmans’ Research Saved Our Marriage

Amelia Ruggaber

Dancing My Way Back to Me

Dancing My Way Back to Me

Jennon Bell Hoffmann

Contemporary Dance: The Beauty of Self-Expression

Contemporary Dance: The Beauty of Self-Expression

Grotto

Hosting a Party for the Big Game? 4 Chili Recipes for Your Playbook

Hosting a Party for the Big Game? 4 Chili Recipes for Your Playbook

Grotto

Why I’m Trying to Live Authentically On- and Offline

Why I’m Trying to Live Authentically On- and Offline

Manda Carpenter

Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop

Women Find Healing Through Kintsugi Workshop

Grotto

How to Meal Prep and Why You Should

How to Meal Prep and Why You Should

Kate Fowler

How to Kick Your Bad Habits — Once and For All

How to Kick Your Bad Habits — Once and For All

Julia Hogan-Werner

Facing the Pandemic as a Single Person

Facing the Pandemic as a Single Person

Grace Carroll

How Much to Drink on Dates (and Still Have Fun)

How Much to Drink on Dates (and Still Have Fun)

Isaac Huss

Mindful Eating: What It Is and How to Do It

Mindful Eating: What It Is and How to Do It

Bethany Meola

Free Download: 1-Month Transition to a Zero-Waste Lifestyle Challenge

Free Download: 1-Month Transition to a Zero-Waste Lifestyle Challenge

Grotto

Hunched Over a Desk All Day? Use These 3 Stretches to Loosen Up

Hunched Over a Desk All Day? Use These 3 Stretches to Loosen Up

Hanna Van Elk

How to Help a Friend Who Survived Sexual Assault

How to Help a Friend Who Survived Sexual Assault

Erin Ramsey-Tooher

How to Take a Thoughtful Approach to Voting

How to Take a Thoughtful Approach to Voting

Dan Masterton

newsletter

We’d love to be pals.

Sign up for our newsletter, and we’ll meet you in your inbox each week.