Read

Dear Therapist: My Husband Can’t Find a Job, and I’m Anxious About Money

Creator:
Published:
August 14, 2024
May 27, 2024
Read this article to find out ways to deal with money anxiety while in a relationship from a therapist

Dear Therapist,

My husband has decided to leave his current career because it is unfulfilling, stressful, and in general the industry doesn’t treat its employees well. I am very supportive of this, and it has presented the opportunity for us to move closer to family. However, he has been applying for jobs for months, and hasn’t even gotten an interview. We are now approaching his last day at his current job, and I am stressing about potentially being the sole income earner for a while. I know he is feeling guilty and stressed about this. How can I best support him in this transition and difficult job search while also managing my own anxiety? 

— Anxious Spouse

Dear Anxious Spouse,

Thank you for sharing your concerns about your husband's career transition and the stress it's causing both of you. I want you to know that you are approaching this challenge with the perfect mindset, one of support and teamwork.

Communication will be key during this transition. I would recommend asking your husband what he needs and being attentive to his cues. If he doesn’t easily open up about his feelings, I’m sure you know him well and can guess what would help him relax and destress, like praying together, regular exercise, physical affection, or socializing with good friends.

It’s equally important for you to communicate your needs and I hope you feel justified in doing so. In as much as he has extra time, consider asking him to help with duties that you normally handle but that are more likely to emotionally tax you. 

While you work on communication, remember to manage your own anxiety. You could schedule regular check-ins with each other, perhaps every other week, so you can connect without the pressure to fix anything. It might also help to establish an open-door policy to share with one another anytime you are feeling overwhelmed.

One helpful way to address your anxiety is to practice gratitude. Can you give thanks to God for the strength of your relationship, your health, the temporary nature of this situation, or that you have a supportive family? Expressing appreciation for your husband’s efforts can also strengthen your bond during this challenging time. 

Given the uncertainty of the job search, it's natural to feel anxious about the financial aspect. Just remember that when this is done, you will have some interesting stories to tell your kids and meaningful experiences to share with others. You are going to be the go-to couple for advice because you'll have earned your stripes (even if not by design). This transition is a shared journey, and facing it together while trusting in God’s providence will strengthen your relationship. Keep prioritizing open communication, mutual support, and gratitude, and you'll navigate this period with resilience.

— Regina Boyd, LMHC

Creators:
Grotto, Regina Boyd
Published:
August 14, 2024
May 27, 2024
On a related note...
How a Morning Habit Gave Me Peace and Purpose

How a Morning Habit Gave Me Peace and Purpose

Grace Spiewak

This WNBA Player Reminds Us It's Okay to Fall Apart

This WNBA Player Reminds Us It's Okay to Fall Apart

Grotto Shares

The Playlist that Turned My Life Around

The Playlist that Turned My Life Around

Brandy Norton

When You're Infertile, 'Pregnancy Envy' Is Actually a Form of Grief

When You're Infertile, 'Pregnancy Envy' Is Actually a Form of Grief

Stacey Huneck

Podcast S1 | Ep3: Change of Heart

Podcast S1 | Ep3: Change of Heart

Grotto

How to Take Charge of Your Life

How to Take Charge of Your Life

Khang Tran

3 Ways You Can Repair a Sibling Relationship

3 Ways You Can Repair a Sibling Relationship

Claire Collins

How Healthy is Your Relationship with Rest?

How Healthy is Your Relationship with Rest?

Sophie Caldecott

Veterans Work with Rescued Wolves to Overcome Trauma

Veterans Work with Rescued Wolves to Overcome Trauma

Grotto

What to Do if You Have No Friends

What to Do if You Have No Friends

Marye Colleen Larme

Free Download: Prevent Stress from Running Your Life

Free Download: Prevent Stress from Running Your Life

Grotto

Dealing with Morning Anxiety? These Sleep Hygiene Tips Can Help

Dealing with Morning Anxiety? These Sleep Hygiene Tips Can Help

Ivan Brea

In an Upside-Down Pandemic World, I Found Stability in Books

In an Upside-Down Pandemic World, I Found Stability in Books

Liz Colleran

Having Trouble Sleeping? Use These Stretches to Power Down

Having Trouble Sleeping? Use These Stretches to Power Down

Hanna Van Elk

Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit

Why Letting Go of Expectations is a Freeing Habit

Julia Hogan-Werner

Beat the Winter Blues with New Hobbies and Friends

Beat the Winter Blues with New Hobbies and Friends

Grace Poppe

Having a Panic Attack in a Costco Parking Lot

Having a Panic Attack in a Costco Parking Lot

Javi Zubizarreta

I Was Hiding My Pain, Not Healing

I Was Hiding My Pain, Not Healing

Alessandra Harris

What You Need to Know about Seasonal Depression

What You Need to Know about Seasonal Depression

Julia Hogan-Werner

What No One Told Me About Starting my PhD

What No One Told Me About Starting my PhD

Hallie Michelle

newsletter

We’d love to be pals.

Sign up for our newsletter, and we’ll meet you in your inbox each week.